


Well, Fuck You Too, Strider

by AnabielVriskaMars



Series: A Dollar And Some Rum [1]
Category: Homestuck
Genre: F/M, davejade - Freeform, non-sburb AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-09-08
Updated: 2013-09-08
Packaged: 2017-12-25 22:59:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,189
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/958622
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AnabielVriskaMars/pseuds/AnabielVriskaMars
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dave is your friend.</p><p>He has been your friend ever since you were thirteen.</p><p>You know this, but it still bothers you to watch him lamely pick up idiots at the bar.</p><p>You are more bothered by the fact that you are wearing the 3AM dress he said he liked on you though he has yet to acknowledge that you are. </p><p>You gulp your drink before realising that the fire in your throat is not rage, but rum.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Well, Fuck You Too, Strider

It's half-past midnight.

You sit next to Rose. She wears that beautiful yellow dress with a sun in its centre. Her earrings match the dress, and she looks absolutely spectacular. You know she's dressed up because Kanaya Maryam is supposed to come tonight, and she is the only one Rose would try this hard to look good for.

You're happy for her, you really are. And the fact that exactly the moment Kanaya walks through that door Rose will disappear does not make you bitter.

You grit your teeth.

Nope. Not bitter at all.

You sit in an uncomfortable bar stool, nursing a coke (which you pretend is a rum and coke for the sake of people around you). The conversation you were having with Rose has deteriorated in her drunken ranting, and for a moment you wonder if it is really a good idea to allow her to meet Kanaya under the influence.

"So," she says. Rose extends the O sound when she speaks, as she often does when drunk, and smiles slyly at you. You know the subject that is bound to come up. "Have you finally decided to give in and date Karkat?"

You glare through your large round glasses. Rose always "finds it hillarious when you try to be mean but still look adorable."

"No." You say curtly. Rose rolls her eyes exaggerately. Before she can protest anything, you continue speaking. "Karkat is really nice, and I really appreciate him as a friend, but I can't stand the amount of screaming that comes out of that boy's mouth."

"And Tavros?" Rose asks and nudges you with her elbow. "If you don't hurry he's gonna run for Vriska."

You shrug.

"I'll pity his soul if he does, but he seems to like her, so cheers." you reply. 

"Your choice, I suppose," Rose says. You realize her pitch is steady, and wonder for a moment if the drink she has in her hand right this second is not vodka, as you'd assumed, but just plain old water. 

You both stare at the mirror behind the bottles in the bar. Rose turns her head, as she seems to have heard something, and you steal a glance from her and realise that her expression has melted into amusement.

"Guess who's arrived?" she says, a small monalisa-like smile painting itself on her lips.

 

You hear what Rose heard: a low hum of murmurs in highpitched voices that can only belong to the predatorial behaviour of girls who have spotted a handsome boy and are waiting for their moment to attack.

And you know exactly who that boy is.

You smile wide. The first good thing in the night has happened.

You twirl in your seat and find your brother and his best friend, Rose's brother, staring at you.

John smiles and his eyes sparkle from behind his rectangular glasses, and it makes you think about how alike you both look.

Dave doesn't smile, but you can see the smallest, upward turn of muscle on the right edge of his lips. You beam at them.

"Hello, boys!" you grin. John steps closer and hugs you, ruffling your hair. 

You shriek. "John! No! I just brushed it!"

John doesn't stop. He ruffles your hair some more.

"Brushed it? Miracle of miracles! And you're wearing a dress?" He mocks surprise and laughs. "Who are you trying to impress?"

You laugh at him, knowing he's right. It's not common for you to do your hair in any fashion. Its usually long and unkempt, but it never bothers you. John's hair is also always ruffled and black, just like yours, but you think it suits you both.

Dave and Rose, on the other hand, always look perfect and immaculate and blond.

Well, Rose looks immaculate and blonde. Dave works extremely hard to be immaculate but to look just perfectly disheveld.

You turn to Dave and hold your arms open for a hug. From behind his sunglasses, he raises an eyebrow. 

"It's an  _ironic_ hug, Dave" you mock. You know Dave so well that you can actually imagine his eyes rolling from behind the stupid sunglasses he wears inside the dark bar. Dave crosses his arms and you drop yours at your sides, pretending to be hurt. "Fine, I will  _never_ offer you another hug!"

"Good to see you too, Harley," he replies. "Now how about we grab a table and sit in front of one another like fucking human beings instead of crabs who have to turn on their sides to see each other?"

"That's not how crabs work," you say. Dave shrugs. "Besides, there are no tables available."

Dave jerks his thumb over his shoulder at a newly available four-person table.

Of course everything always works in benefit of Dave Strider.

By the time you arrive at the table, you realise that Rose is nowhere to be seen. Before you can ask, your brother laughs and points at the door.

"Rose is the queen of disapparition. The magic word is Kanaya." John laughs at his lame joke and you feel the tug of your lips as you try not to laugh out of sheer embarassment. John is not done speaking, though. "Is that Terezi with Kanaya?"

Dave lazily raises his head and looks towards the door. You don't turn around and feel a pang of annoyance, though you cannot put your finger on the reason.

"Yeah," Dave says, "it is."

John raises his hand and waves at what you assume is Terezi. Again, you do not bother turning.

You have nothing against Terezi Pyrope. You seldom have a problem with anyone, really, but for some reason, the last thing you want is to have Terezi join your party in place of Rose.

Despite your unvoiced wishes, however, Terezi sits in Rose's seat, between you and John.

"What's up." She says. you half nod at her and take a drink of coke. You feel her eyes on you. "Jeez Harl, didn't know you were a drinker."

You don't tell her that its coke in your hand, but raise both eyebrows in a noncommital answer, which you think might have been rather rude. You catch a glimpse of Dave's side glance where his shades don't hide his eyes, and in that spare second you can feel the question.

_Something wrong?_

You don't reply, and instead stand. "I'm out." You say pointing at your cup. Walking to the bar, you set it down and murmur at the bartender for another coke.

You catch a reflection in the mirror.

The boys are talking to Terezi and seem to be perfectly comfortable. For a moment, you think you see Dave smile.

You feel heat in the pit of your stomach and take the cup from the bartender, gulping it quickly and swiftly in one go.

"Are you sure you wanna do that? It was kind of loaded?" The bartender says.

It takes you a moment to realize that the burn of your throat and increasing heat in your stomach is not the unexplained rage you felt earlier, but the heaviness of rum sliding into you.

_Shit._

The bartender must have misunderstood your order.

Its too late though. You set the cup down and take a few seconds. You feel alright. The world insn't spinning. You had never tried alcohol before, but apparently it does not affect you as much as you'd feared.

You twirl on your heel to head back towards the table.

Bad idea.

It took a second, but you can now feel the effects of alcohol taking over you.

You blink slowly. 

The world moves lazily. Its a funny feeling.

The tips of your fingers can't feel the bar you are holding, and your lips can't feel your teeth sinking into them.

As preocupying as you know it should be, this is plain funny.

You toss your hair back and walk towards the table where your friends and Terezi await, and promptly fall down on the chair. They look at you, measuring you. You think you hear John ask if you're alright. You smile with your goofy teeth (those that have always made you feel self-conscious). A movement to your side catches your eye, and you turn to see Dave, his brow furrowed in confusion and maybe concern, and look down to see his hand over yours. You cannot feel it. Words jump out of your mouth.

"My, my, Mr. Strider," you say in a low tone. You think it matches Rose's perfect, sultry voice. "Feeling bold, aren't we?" Your words are hillarious. You laugh. Dave doesn't. You don't care about the other two.

"Jade, are you alright?" he asks. for a moment you think his gaze is intense enough that you can actually see the outline of his (marvelous) red eyes behind the shades.

You turn your head to face him and smile fully; not the shy, small smiles you're used to, but a full-on 32-teeth smile. "I'm perfect."

You see his every move in slow motion. He leans closer, and for half a second you wonder if he's trying to kiss you. Before you can react, though, he pulls back and turns to John.

"She stinks of rum, man."

Terezi laughs. You had forgotten she was there. She is an annoying fly and you feel the need to swat her and make her go away. You want to transmit these feelings through your eyes, but apparently you cannot, or she doesn't notice, for she speaks between chuckles.

"Doesn't this remind you of our first date, Dave?" she asks.

You bite a piece of your lip so hard it might come off. You wouldn't notice, though, because you can't feel your lips. 

You knew that Dave and Terezi dated some time ago. They broke it off and Terezi went off with a ridiculous religious fanatic until she broke that off, too. Rumor has it that she has a thing for Karkat right now.

And Karkat has a thing for you, so suck it, Pyrope.

John interrupts your glare by making a question. you suppose he caught on with your burning spite of Terezi.

"How did you guys even end up going out, anyways?" He asks.

Ah, John may have caught on, but he's a retarded douchtard Patron Saint of being an asshole.

Wow.

You have never thought like this about your brother.

"Well," Terezi says, "Strider came to me with the most ridiculous pick-up line I'd ever heard, and I laughed so hard I couldn't say no." She explains. You roll your eyes.

"Oh wow," John says.

"What was the line?" You ask. You feel Dave's concerned eyes on you, but ignore them. "I'd love to hear the Great Strider's Plays."

""You know I'd like to invite you over, but I'm afraid you're so hot that you'll skyrocket my air-conditioning bill."" Terezi says. John snorts. Dave glares at him.

"I was being  _ironic_. It got me the date though." He replies. He's no longer looking at you.

You feel the fire in your stomach. You need to drink something. You snatch Dave's beer from in front of him.

"Well,  _whoever_ says no to the Incredible Dave Strider? Nope. She's just a girl. Can't expect her to resist your  _inhuman_  charm." You feel the bitterness drip from every spewed word. Terezi cackles murmuring something about not being able to hold your liquor. John blinks, confused. Dave just stares at you, his usual blank stare melted into a look of pure astonishment. You smile wryly and take a swig of beer.

You swallow hard and slam the bottle against the table, with not enough force to break it.

_Beer is disgusting._

Once again, John tries to relieve tension. "Well, I've heard worse lines. 'Do you have a BandAid? I just scraped my knee falling for you.' was one I once genuinely used." He says and laughs.

"Poor girl. Did it even work?" Terezi asks.

"Nope." John replies. He laughs as he explains to Terezi how terrible that night went.

Cloudiness has taken over your mind. The desire to walk away from this table is strong. You want to get away from John. From Terezi. And especially from Dave.

"Well kids," you say. "It's been fun, but I think I'm just gonna go home." You stand, leaning on the table.

"Uhm... Jade... I'm taking you home... remember?" John holds up his keys. You shrug.

"I'm sure some  _lovely_ gentleman tonight will be simply ecstatic to drop me off at home. Ta!"

You turn and walk away, and you feel your 3AM dress shift gracefully around you. For the first time in years, you feel like a mother fucking queen. You're in control. You don't need John or Rose. You certainly don't need Dave, either. You're the only one out of all four of you that can actually manage a gun, so you're safest, even by yourself.

(Not that you could fit a gun under your three AM dress, but those are just details, right?)

Your hand reaches for the door. Another hand beats you to it, holding the door closed from over your head. You spin, ready to give this ass a piece of your mind.

You open your eyes to find the burning (beautiful amazing gorgeous stunning) red gaze of Dave staring right into your green eyes.

"Jade." He says with a coldness (not the coolness he uses, oh no. he's angry and cold and you can feel it ad you didn't know fire could feel so cold) "What the fuck is going on."

You're angry. How dare he demand an answer?

How  _dare_ he demand anything?

The words slip from your lips before you can think.

"Fuck you, Strider."

His eyes widen. You can see it through the shades. You take this moment to slip out the door. You hear his footsteps. He's right behind you. You don't turn, but there's a grip around your wrist, and it halts you.

Now you spin angrily.

"What." You snap.

"Jade, what the hell is wrong with you?" He asks. You've never seen Dave so agitated. A small ounce of guilt is quickly drowned in an ocean of rage.

"Nothing is wrong with me." You snap. "I'm perfectly fine. Perfect little Jade. Sweet Jade. Innocent Jade. Doesn't-much-brush-her-hair Jade." 

"Then what--?" You cut him off.

"You're the problem." You have no idea of what you're saying. The world is spinning. You can only see Dave and his usually lazy movements now become sharper. "You're a slut, Strider."

"I'm -- _what?"_

 _"Jegus Christ_ Dave, all day, every day, all I ever hear is about Dave Strider and his conquests." You rage. "You never have a single moment to dedicate to me. I'm your  _friend._ But you know, who the  _fuck_  cares when there's girls to sweep off their feet right? Who  _cares_ about little duckling Jade when there's a thousand swans to sweep off their feet with  _ironic_ pick-up lines, yea?"

Dave's mouth hangs open. He closes it and slips two fingers under his glasses, rubbing his eyes.

"Are you for real?" He asks. Before you reply, he adds, "Jade, are you fucking  _jealous_?"

You scoff. The nerve! What a ridiculous notion. You? jealous of Pyrope? Of  _anyone?_

"No!" You yell, but don't sound convincing. Not to yourself, and evidently not to Dave, judging by the way he's watching you, as if you were a present he was trying to guess. You rant and flail your arms meaninglessly, trying to explain, but the only word that comes out of your mouth is another 'No.'

"Jade." He says. "You realise that," he pauses exhales and inhales once more, "Jade, you are so fucking important to me, do you get that?"

You shake your head, trying to explain that you know, yeah, you're his friend, you know he cares about you, but no words come out of your mouth. Instead, you feel a dam of tears in your eyes. You refuse to let them out.

"Jade." He speaks softly. You look up at him, and now you're sure, with the streetlights to illuminate you, that his eyes are no longer a raging fire, but a soft warm ember. He grabs one of your hands. You vaguely notice that the feeling is returning to your fingers.

He looks at you for a long time. You don't know what he's thinking about. you wonder if he thinks you're an idiot. That you ruined the friendship. That you're just a clingy fucktard and that he's going to take his distance at least until you get yourself under control.

For the first time in your ten-year friendship, you see Dave Strider smile.

It's not the small smirk that you have only seen him give to you.

It is not an ironic grin/grimace like the one he gives John when he's being an idiot.

It's a small, almost inexistent smile that could be taken in so many ways.

He smiles just like Rose, you realise.

Cryptic and special and only for someone important.

You feel truly important to him.

You feel  _unique_ to him.

"You made fun of my pickup lines." He says softly. "Wanna hear my best?"

Wordlessly, you nod, not knowing what else to do.

He reaches into his pocket and draws out his wallet. You're confused. He smirks at you and draws out a dollar.

"I bet you," he challenges, holding the dollar between his middle and index finger, "this dollar that I can kiss you without touching your lips."

You're confused. What the hell is he trying to do?

"Accept the bet?" He asks. You shrug mindlessly. "Perfect."

You don't have time to register your confusion. 

His lips are placed perfectly in par with yours. His shades tough the rim of your glasses. Your eyes are closed, though you can't tell when that happened.

The kiss is chaste and innocent and sweet and it lasts a second longer than it was necessary. When he pulls back, you instinctively move forward, trying to trap that warmth again with your lips. 

You stay like that for a few seconds. By the time you both pull back, you realise that your hand is resting on his neck, and that his hands and sunggly pressed against your hips.

You see your reflection in his glasses and feel the embarassment creeping into your face. You draw your hand from his neck and hold it against your chest. He releases only one side of your waist.

"Worth every penny." He whispers gently as he places the dollar into your hand. You stare at the bill in wonder and amazement, not sure of what just happened.

He leans in for a hug, but its not the one you had asked for before.

Its tender and soft and gentle and warm and you cannot feel the cold breeze of night across your bare shoulders and arms because all you can feel around you is Dave.

"I'm sorry," you whisper into his shirt. For the first time in the night you realise that you have behaved apallingly. Your mind is clear now, what with the cold and the adrenaline and the idea

oh my god oh my god oh my god

that you just kissed Dave.

"I care for you," he whispers softly into your ear. Cold washes over you as you understand that he means to tell you that you are just friends. For a moment you wish for the numbness of alcohol again and try to pull away from him.

"I'm an idiot," you say as you pull back and untangle your arms from around his neck. "I'm sorry, I was a brat and now this must be really awkward for you," you mumble, "it's okay." You say, looking anywhere but at him. "We're friends, I know. Don't worry" You wipe an oncoming tear off your right eye, "this won't affect our friendship." You nod at yourself.

Dave says nothing, so you risk a glance at him.

He stares at you.

Not through his shades.

He is _genuinely_ looking at you with his stunning red eyes from over his shades. They rest on his nose. The expression in them is unique. You see in them what Dave has never expressed with his attitude.

If you thought Dave usually wore a blank expression, then you were wrong.

His eyes carry all the might of what can only be called a "What the Everloving Fuck" sentiment.

You shy away slightly. Dave keeps staring at you for ten ful heartbeats.

"You are unbelievable, Harley." He breathes.

You furrow your brows, confused. Before you can react, he takes a long step towards you and wraps his arms once again around your waist. He speaks into your ear.

"Fuck, Jade." He says, and you can feel the difficulty he has trying to pic the right words. You're surprised, as he has always been a master of raps and speeches. "Just--fuck. Why do you make this so hard."

You don't understand what he means, you want to ask, but your lips are nonresponsive, and this time it has nothing to do with alcohol.

He pulls back a bit and looks at you, this time through his shades. You wonder if being without them makes him feel exposed and vulnerable.

"You're fucking badass. Okay?" Dave says. He looks at the floor as he says it. "You're so fucking brilliant on all your gardening shit that I wouldn't be surprised if you fucking created a new plant to end world hunger. If we lived in the Harry Potter world you'd be the teacher of all thoes motherfuckers. And they'd respect you because shit, you're amazing."

He rakes a hand through his hair, which lightly falls in exactly the same position.

"If you had a showdown with James Bond, you'd beat his ass because he wouldn't be able to draw a gun on you. Also your aim is fucking amazing and not normal for a 23-year old girl." He seems rather frustrated. "And you're cute as a fucking puppy to boot."

You feel heat rise to your face. Does Dave mean this?

"On top of all that you're the sweetest person I fucking know. You should never go on the woods alone because the fucking Hansel and Gretel witch would eat you because you're the motherfucking kindest person I know in this godforsaken town. Then suddenly you start acting out against Terezi and I didn't know why, and then I saw that you'd been drinking and I thought 'Shit, is she jealous? Nah, how could she be jealous? She's fucking Jade Harley.' And then I realised that wow man, you fucking were. And I don't get why. Terezi's pretty cool, but she ain't you. She ain't a  _fraction_ of you. If someone had ever told 13-year old me that I would  _ever_ make you jealous I would've said 'yea, great story bro, but if you wanna talk shit, Gamzee's your man, not me'. And then you storm out of the bar saying that you're gonna hitch a ride with some fucking asshole who may try to put his disgusting sausage fingers on you and I fucking flipped."

He takes a deep breath.

"Shit. Do you get it, Jade? Do you fucking get it? I'm a fucking tramp, yeah. But I'm more than that. I'm pretty much an asshole who doesn't do much all day and has no fucking ambitions in this goddamn life and I spent my time doing lame ass raps. The fuck was I supposed to do? You're out of my fucking league and I spend my days trying to get over that, and when I'm finally managing that, you turn up with this shit. Fuck, Harley, why do you make this so hard on me?"

"I make this 'hard on you'?" You want to laugh. What? Dave? Dave thinking he's not enough for you? What the hell? "I see you parade this endless line of girls in front of me and it always bothered me and I didn't know why! It took Terezi and getting shitfaced to understand it! You get it?" This time you don't hold back your laughter. You throw your head back and the sound of your (terrible) voice just echoes into the night. Dave smirks that smirk that's only for you.

"We're both idiots, yeah?"

"Yeah." You say.

Dave presses his forehead against yours. His eyes bore into yours. You have never felt this warm in your life.

It's half past two in the morning.

 

 

* * *

 

Rose and Kanaya take a seat next to John and Terezi.

"Where the fuck are Dave and Jade?" John asks. Rose smirks. Terezi laughs.

"Making you owe me a tenner." Rose points at the door. Dave holds it open for Jade. He looks pleased. She looks radiant.

"Aw shucks. Seriously?" John asks.

"I told you they'd be together by Christmas." Rose holds out an open palm. John rolls his eyes and slaps a ten dollar bill into it.

"Yeah, yeah, you're always right, whatever."

Jade and Dave arrive. They say nothing, but Dave pulls up two chairs for them.

The next round is on Dave. All is good.


End file.
